How to Have a "Good" Divorce


With about half of all marriages ending in divorce, you'd think we'd have the process down to a science. But divorce in Pasadena, like marriage, is complicated. A couple married for five years who have no children together will have different needs than a couple who was married for 20 years while raising a family and starting a business together. This means that finding reliable online divorce advice can be difficult. It's best to let your attorney provide advice on the specific legal issues surrounding your divorce, while remembering that there are still a few general rules for a "good" divorce that everyone can benefit from.

Experts agree that the key to a "good" divorce is to begin with a clear view of the relationship you eventually want to have with your spouse. Do you want to be good friends who have simply realized the romantic component of their relationship was no longer working? If so, screaming and calling each other names is not a helpful approach. If you want to go your separate ways and have no future contact, this is perfectly acceptable unless you have children together. If you have young children together, you will need to maintain a relationship that is suitable for successful co-parenting regardless of your personal feelings towards each other.

Second, realize that placing blame is not beneficial. Nobody is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes. To move forward, you must admit to your own mistakes while taking responsibility for the future choices you make. Continuing to see yourself as the victim of your spouse's actions prevents you from handling your divorce in a mature and rational fashion.

Collaborative law and mediation are often thought of as the key to having a "good" divorce because they result in less of a need for adversarial courtroom battles. But, not all Pasadena divorce lawyers have experience with these techniques. If you're committed to making your breakup in a mature and rational fashion, select legal representation with a proven background in these new approaches to matrimonial law.