Tips for Co-Parenting After a High Conflict Divorce


Ideally, parents would automatically realize the need to put aside their differences and work together for the benefit of the children post-divorce. Unfortunately, Pasadena divorce lawyers report that those who experience a high conflict divorce marked by anger, hostility, and a refusal to make reasonable compromises, tend to continue their struggles when it's time to establish a co-parenting relationship.

In a high conflict situation, it can be helpful to have someone act as an intermediary between you and your ex. If you have a mutual friend or a family member who can be impartial, this might help you amicably resolve child-related issues like coordinating visitation drop offs and pickups. You can also seek the services of a professional parenting coordinator from your local family court, although this option can be quite pricey.

If finding someone to act as an intermediary isn't possible, consider limiting your communication to emails and text messages. Since these forms of communication are less emotionally charged, it should be easier to prevent conversations from spiraling out of control. Emails and texts can also be used as evidence in a legal proceeding, so you'll have support for your case if you ever need to head back to court to resolve a custody or visitation issue.

Taking your ex back to court is an option if the troublesome behavior involves repeated violations of custody, visitation, and/or child support agreements. Violations of a court order can be penalized in several different ways, with possible jail time for failure to pay child support. Your attorney can provide additional information regarding how to properly enforce a court order.

Finally, to preserve your own sanity, consider seeking help from a therapist. A trained professional can listen to your feelings, help you work through your own anger, provide suggestions for ways to respond when your ex is being controlling and/or irrational, and offer advice on how to tackle any behavioral issues your children may be experiencing after the divorce.

How Can We Help?

Please call our office at (626) 683-8113 or email us at if you are a parent in need of assistance with a child custody, visitation, or child support related issue. Our experienced Pasadena divorce attorneys are eager to advocate for your interests throughout the divorce process and help you receive a settlement that will allow you to move on with the next phase of your life.