Having a Child-Focused Divorce



If you're thinking of filing for a Pasadena divorce and have children with your soon-to-be ex, you may have heard people talking about the "child-focused divorce" and wondered what exactly this term means.

A child-focused divorce is not a legal term. Rather, this is a parenting philosophy that both spouses have mutually agreed upon. It means that they will do their best to put aside their differences and work together to minimize the effect the divorce has on their child's life.

Although some of the research regarding the effect of divorce on kids can be disturbing to read, the child-focused divorce trend is usually the result of personal experience. Many parents who advocate a child-focused divorce watched their own parents go through a bitter and messy divorce when they were younger. They remember feeling torn between their mother and father or being resentful of the sacrifices they were expected to make after the divorce. In many cases, they still do not have good relationships with their parents due to the divorce. By keeping the needs of their own children at the front of the divorce negotiation process, they hope to be able to preserve some form of family unity for the future.

A "bird's nest" custody arrangement in which the children remain in the family home and the parents take turns moving in and out of the home is one example of a child-focused divorce approach. Having both parents attend school functions together with the child is another example of the child-focused approach to parenting after a divorce. In a child-focused divorce, the children's lives continue much like they would have if their parents had remained married.

The child-focused divorce takes a lot of communication between the parents. It is an admirable goal, but one that might not be attainable in all circumstances. For example, a child-focused divorce becomes more complicated once one of the parents decides to remarry. However, having your Pasadena divorce lawyer make sure that all of the specifics of your child support and child custody arrangements are properly documented can go a long way towards making the child-focused divorce attainable for your family.