In the wake of a devastating divorce, it may feel like you will never find love again. Many people worry they made a mistake after a divorce. However, it’s important to remember that your divorce happened for valid reasons. There was something that brought you to that point, and that cannot be disregarded.
Now, it’s time to move forward. These five tips may give you a gentle push to get back out there and rediscover love.
#1. Make Sure You Have Moved On
You can only put your best self out there once you have moved on from your past. Make sure you have truly moved on from your relationship, processed your emotions from it, and do not have any lingering resentment. If you do not do this, you may find that you’re thinking of your ex while on a date with someone else to whom you should be giving your attention. You may also find you’re making unfair comparisons, which is never ideal for the start of a new relationship.
#2. Be Honest About What You’re Looking For
While you don’t have to divulge your entire history on the first date, it’s still smart to have some idea about what you’re looking for in a partner. If a first date casually mentions they don’t want children, and you do, it may be better to say no to a second date. You don’t want to get involved with someone who you know has different goals than you.
#3. Know That Chemistry Is Not Everything
Two people can have very similar personalities and, thus, good chemistry. However, this is not the only element needed for a successful relationship. It’s vital that people not only have things in common or compatible personalities. They must also have common life goals and morals.
#4. Don’t Just Look for Your “Type”
People don’t just have one “type.” Just like preference changes in other areas, the type of person we are attracted to can change over time. Try not to cross people off your dating list just because they don’t meet one specific criterion. Often, someone who you would not have ordinarily considered can end up being the best match for you.
#5. Consider Attending Therapy During This Process
It might be helpful to find a therapist while you’re going through this process. Speaking with a qualified professional can help you work through your feelings and understand whether dating right now is the best thing for you. Your therapist may provide helpful advice you can use to move forward.
Divorce is never easy. If you need help with your divorce, our Pasadena family law attorneys can help you find the right solution. Call Schweitzer Law Partners at (626) 788-5225 to schedule a consultation.